The Ages of "War"

January 16th, 1991. I was eleven. I clearly remember it was a Wednesday, as my mother had tossed the idea of skipping mid-week church to hear President Bush speak on the day’s events. America was officially at war. The word scared me – I suppose it still does today. My heart sank and my eyes must have grown the size of silver dollars as my mother, hiding the heaviness in her voice, quickly assured me “It will be okay. There are wars all the time all over the world.” At eleven, my only pictures of war were from drawings and stories in my history book and from the faces of the men who stood at Branson variety shows when veterans were recognized (I didn't realize my grandfathers served our country until years later). But the history pages were black and white, many with mere sketchings of past Presidents or military generals.  The reality of the war playing out on CNN, with reporters ducking for cover as the night raids brought rockets and bombs, was redefining my ideas. Several months later when my classmate’s dad was sent to Desert Storm, we all wrote him letters, colored yellow ribbons, and sing-songed chants of “Peace in the Middle East.”   

Over the past few weeks I’ve reminisced at my naiveness from those 22 years ago. And, been thankful for it. This past September 11, my school-teacher nephew asked his junior high students what the day meant to them. Many of them had never seen pictures of “9-11” or knew the details of that tragic day – the start of a new, different kind of war. I suppose that depending on the generation - and situation - “war” may be defined by yellow ribbons and patriotism, by hippies and protests, or by the latest Call of Duty game or television drama. My own TV flips from SpongeBob and back to Fox news, depending on if my six-year old, cotton-topped son is in the room. So, with his cartoon on pause, I asked him last night, “Cole, what does the word “war” mean?” "Oh, you mean like a thumb war?" he asked, with an excited grin on his face, ready to battle. "Yes, buddy. That's exactly what I mean." For now, anyway.

Where did it go?

We sold the crib (as though he slept in it a single night)

To a cute young couple.

He was muscly and eager – proud of his craigslist bargain.

Her baby tummy stretched toward her

Crisp maternity top, her voice bubbly with nursery plans.

We donated the swing to the church.

Gingham and blue.
Old-school – just the way I wanted it.
(Although it always seemed to go a bit too high and too fast for my liking.)

We handed-me-down the 2Ts, 3Ts and 4Ts

Tiny Easter suits.  Cottony soft footie jammies.
Thomas the Train shirts.  Elmo red shorts.

I know where all those things went.

But time.

Where did time go?

My baby boy – all 53 pounds & 48 inches of him –

Whose dimply, toothless grin accents
His cute chin freckle.
Whose blond hair glimmers white after
A season of summer.
Whose eyes gently close as I sing him to
Sleep each night.
Whose hide & seek giggle of “Daddy, ee r oo?”
Turned into “Excuse me, Dad, but can
We play Wipeout on the Xbox?” –
Will start first grade in a few weeks.

“First grade, already?” they ask.

I ask myself.

Where did the time go?

And, while I would love to answer this

Question with poetry and surety,
I have no answer.

So –

Knowing each second deepens the question,

And quickens the moments toward
first grade, second grade, fifth grade, 16 –

I hold him tighter

Longer.

I sing bedtime songs sweeter

Slower.

I make each kiss, hug, smile, and laugh count.

Count more than the seconds of

The all too elusive

time.

POOFing Jesus

In the book of Matthew, just 3 verses after Jesus states, "If you have faith as a small mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to here,' and it will move," a curious thing happens.

Jesus and his disciples were asked to pay the temple tax.  Peter approached Jesus about it, and, after some dialogue, Jesus sent Peter to "fish" for the tax.  Literally. 

Go and throw out your line.  Take the first fish you catch; open its mouth and you will find a four-drachma coin.  Take it and give it to them for my tax and yours.

Why didn't Jesus just "poof" the tax? 

He easily could have said, "Here you are, Peter" and (poof!), like a white gloved magician, produced a coin out of air. 
But He didn't.

He easily could have said, "Peter, if you close your eyes and pray, (poof!) a coin will fly into your pocket." 
But He didn't.

He easily could have said, "Peter, just as you can ask the mountains to be moved, you can ask the temple tax to be (poof!) done away with."
But He didn't.

No.  Instead Peter had to leave Jesus' side, go get his fishing gear, bait his hook, throw out the line, wait for a fish, and then dig the coin out of the slimy mouth.

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I don't understand Jesus' choices or ways to get a job done.   Why did He put spit on a blind man's eyes to heal him?  Why did he allow Lazarus to be dead for 3 days instead of healing him before he died?  Why did he allow the woman with the issue of blood to bleed for so many years?  She had the faith before she even touched the hem of his garment, right?  I may not understand.  But I know that Jesus had/has a reason.  And I know He ended every story by meeting the need.

Our vision of Jesus is hindsight.  We know the end of every story.
Peter gets the coin - regardless of how he had to get it.
The blind man is healed - regardless of what was placed on his eyes.
Lazarus was raised from the dead - regardless of how long his sisters grieved.
The woman's issue of blood was healed - regardless of how long she had to wait.

But we don't know the details of our stories.  No book has been written about our life that tells how Jesus' will heal us.  When Jesus will mend hearts.  Where Jesus will meet our pressing need.  Or how long before Jesus answers our prayers.

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What if Peter hadn't obeyed?  What if the story went something like this...

Jesus' Promise:
Go and throw out your line. Take the first fish you catch; open its mouth and you will find a four-drachma coin. Take it and give it to them for my tax and yours.

Peter's (what-if) response:
Are you kidding me?  So, instead of providing for me right here & now, I have to DO something to have my need met?  This is not a "want," Jesus.  This is a NEED.  For crying out loud!  I have seen you do crazy miracles for a whole list of people, and here I ask this tiny thing.  Am I not loyal to you?  I am with you almost every day!  I'm learning from you!  I pray with you!  I know your word!  Forget it.  I'll just figure this out on my own.

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Jesus' Promise:
If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be done for you (John 15:7).  If you ask anything according to my will, I will hear you.  In whatever you ask, you have the requests that you ask of me (1 John 5:14-15).  Whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours (Mark 11:24). 

What's your/my response?...

Family Game

You know, I just got sick of Cole asking to play with his phone (aka an old iTouch from craigslist) during dinner at restaurants, but it was hard to say 'no' when Michael & I kept checking facebook or texts! 

My cousin in Florida sent us a great game for Christmas, which we exhausted the first time we played.  Some of the questions were a bit above Cole's level, so I created my own version.  Cole calls it "Family Game" and asks to play it all the time - even when we aren't at dinner and company comes over!

Instructions:

1. Think of some good questions that could apply to anyone in your family group.
2. Write them down or type them out on small strips of paper or index cards.  Consider typing them on colored paper or adding clip art to make them appear "game like."  Use words that your child can read so he can participate in the reading too.
3. Fold them up & take them with you to dinner.
4. After you order, place them on the table & have your child pick out questions, one by one, to read.
5. Everyone at the table has to participate.  Consider asking "why?" to create more conversation.

Now for question ideas:

• If you could grow any food in the backyard, what would it be?  (Cole's answer was pizza!)
• Would you rather be a teacher or a farmer?
• Where would you like to go that you've never been?
• If you could invite one person on vacation, who would it be?
• What's your favorite holiday?
• What do you want to be when you grown up (what did you want to be?)?
• Would you rather have a pet elephant or a pet zebra?
• What's your favorite color?
• What's your favorite memory?
• If you could trade places with any family member for one day, who would it be?

Have fun!